2010 began like every year of my life will from here onwards – living in complete harmony with my values of life. Not doing anything to undermine them or living by someone else’s values again. When that happens it can only end in sadness or take you down a long road of complete life-wasting. This is why it is so important to me to remain single and free, and have friends until I am sure I have found the person who shares my same values in life, so that we can grow boundlessly together. I know that with the right person I would be taken further than I would imagine on my own, be challenged and motivated every day. But I am far FAR happier on my own than with the wrong person. I’m happy all the time!
I made a very difficult decision a few days ago, to let go of a four year dream of mine to thru-hike the 2,175 mile Appalachian Trail starting in March, to postpone it until 2011. more…
“… you remain a child; rising in love you mature. By and by love becomes not a relationship, it becomes a state of your being. Not that you are in love – now you are love.”
~ Osho
Oh this is SOLID GOLD! Like FAIL blog and Post Secret, this is a site I’ll be visiting all the time:
sleeptalkinman.blogspot.com
“My mild-mannered English husband Adam lives quite a colourful existence in his dreams. Having benefited from hours of delight at his dead-of-night musings, I thought it only fair to share them with the world.”
Here’s a favourite: “Can you hold… can you hold my starfish? It doesn’t like it when I’m getting excited. Oh look, it likes you! Its legs are all cree-py cree-py.”
Listen on NPR
“Scientists have confirmed that men are still evolving — or at least the male chromosome is. Y chromosome is what makes men men. A few years ago, scientists began wondering whether it was in trouble. When they compared it to the X chromosome, which is carried by both men and women, the Y chromosome didn’t seem to measure up.”
Watch it on Vimeo (Expand to full screen and allow to load a little bit for smooth playback)
Kuroshio Sea – 2nd largest aquarium tank in the world
The main tank called the “Kuroshio Sea” holds 7,500-cubic meters (1,981,290 gallons) of water and features the world’s second largest acrylic glass panel, measuring 8.2 meters by 22.5 meters with a thickness of 60 centimeters. Whale sharks and manta rays are kept amongst many other fish species in the main tank.
… under the desert sun. Stay for a day. I want to share my melty bowlful with you. Take my hand as we skip across the railway tracks to the old abandoned houses, shaded cool and damp, and snoop through dusty stuff left behind. I’ll pocket something to remember this day. And as we slip out the door together into the sun melting trickly warm down our bodies, your hand slips softly from my shoulder to the small of my back as I show you my secret new treasure, resting the happiest cheek on your chest. Steady beat. For a second I am lost in you, feeling all your loveliness throughout my body… then I pass it to you quickly before making my escape, heel kicking dust flying towards home, you chasing after me laughing, tagging each other all the way home with street dogs pouncing around us barking like crazy. We are the free.
Your laughter tastes like ice cream. I want to taste all your delicious flavours.
“Oh, god, sweet jesus and all the baby orphans. This is funny. I really hope you haven’t seen it before as you have a treat in store….
I am sure most if not all of these are familiar! Ha ha!” ~ Kerry
Oh gosh, there was an embarrassing glitch today on the site where anyone subscribed to any of the last 100 posts would have received a ton of comment notifications. I am so sorry for the inconvenience. It shouldn’t happen again. If there are any further problems please let me know.
…is all I have ever wanted. I was 20 when I first started dreaming about you. 12 years. I know that this number is no co-incidence. You came to me in dreams and visions constantly. Whoever I was with, wherever I was… sitting around a fire, swimming in the ocean, having drinks with friends. I would see myself standing at the edge of the Grand Canyon, tall and strong, solitary, a lifetime behind me and a larger than lifetime ahead of me, my hair ablaze with the wind. And I would feel you walk up confidently through my past, put your arms around me gently, squeeze me into you and rest your head on me. Your sweet face. You radiate nothing but pure love, just love, into my body. I feel such bliss, such acceptance in that union every time I think of you, us both looking to that bold unknown future together, you following my eyes as I plot the path. I felt you always at my back, always loving me through everything that shaped me before your arrival and everything that would come. When you came to me in these visions while I was sitting somewhere with a partner I loved and wanted to carve out a life with, I would nearly fall apart, because you kept haunting me, kept reminding me that I wanted you. You would come to me every time I cried myself to sleep, promising me it would pass. I wanted you. And I hadn’t even met you. I knew you existed. I knew you were real. I could feel your bubbling, happy, laughing, loving lifeforce all this time. And in the past 2 and a half months I thought of you ever day. I felt everything you were going through, everything you were feeling. I no longer saw visions of you, I felt you. All the time. You are laughing again.
And here you are now, arriving with prophetic timing at the precipice of this huge, looming adventure I’m standing over and above, reviewing the path for this year as I plan to travel so much of it solo. I am standing alone taking in these huge vistas, feeling the wind rush whispers of your arrival through my hair and down my body. I know who you are already. I recognised you immediately. I can hear your footsteps as they grow louder up the path of my past year after year, I can smell your scent on the breeze growing stronger. I am about to feel your arms around me. I am about to meet you for the first time, in 12 years.
“In life itself, apart from the beliefs in what comes before or after it, there is something magnificent. There is something to be found in life that can give so much to a person that he feels that he could swell up and then just burst. That ’something’ is simply the act of living life to the fullest.” ~ Richard Fariña, letter to his father
Since I arrived back from the adventure I’ve been experiencing a strange but undeniably powerful inhale of energy from so many individuals. A small mountain of parcels awaited me in the tiny post office, my inbox was flooded with new work and old friends reconnecting in big ways, my phone hasn’t stopped ringing or beeping, and my little RV home has become the Marathon Meetup Epicenter or something like that. People visiting at all hours and for all lengths of time, lounging out here, drinking tea, talking about every unusual thing under the desert sun. Like they have been starved of the opportunity to talk about the most wonderful things anyone could talk about, and I’m lucky enough to get to discuss all this stuff with them. more…
I have arrived. Oh yes, finally. I didn’t want to post this until I was absolutely sure but its been about a month now, I have seen him in the flesh without it making a bit of difference, so I know its firm and true. Thinking of where I’d be on the Kübler-Ross Grief Cycle makes me laugh now because “Acceptance” doesn’t quite cover it… I will try my best to put it into words.
Considering how many years we were together, falling out of love with someone I was deeply committed to, in just 3 months is much faster than I ever thought possible. I had expected a good few years, with the most likely possibility of Never. more…
It reminds us that on the journey of life, although our history contributes to who we are NOW, it does not control our potential in the present. It is our destiny to find the “end of the road, which is the beginning of the road beyond time”. This is the mental space where we are free to manifest our truest potential, IN THE NOW.
Dragon… this too will pass. I know your truest nature as well as I know my own. Because I carry a little bit of you with me everywhere I go, braided into my mane. I feel when you are sad. You possess infinite joy and happiness. You radiate love that can be felt all across Bisbee, and all the way to this remote desert basin where I live. You lack nothing because you are connected to everything. Please send me your address so that I can send you something from my travels for you to wear, as a reminder of this– your connection to everyone, and all those who have passed on but who’s energy will always be with you and a part of you :@)
Jo… Winter’s a cold lonely bitch up in that mountain. But under her plush white fur coat lies your miracle… your little seed patiently waiting for the first crack of sunlight. I recognise your seed, I sense all that potential, and it is so much more than you realise. Let the anticipation nurture your dreams! Spring is coming soon, but if you feel as I do that we don’t have a moment to lose, to live this life the way we were born to, come out to the desert to sprout, to feel everything, to heal, to play and flourish with me! I will squeeze you tight with all my might and hold your hands, up to the Sun. We who love and laugh all day are Children of the Sun! Her children are always happy, always peaceful, always free. I will make sure you will not leave this place without feeling unbelievably happy and loved.
How do you talk to someone who won’t talk to you?
How do you communicate with someone who won’t communicate with you?
How do you change the world? Ignore them is the answer. But not reject them. Love them absolutely as a reflection of you.
Smile at the recognition of yourself in them.
Stop trying to control the universe. Smile at the fact that they are really just a mirror of the part of you that you are keeping secret. Their game of war is about attention instead of love. You can’t win a war of the mind. Some one always has another answer or question to trick you. more…
What a privilege it has been to spend a week of full-on living, sharing open-heartedly 24 hours a day, with these two souls. Being challenged and awakened, tipping over all its goodness into the new year. My body feels supple and strong, my heart filled with the burning sun, my thoughts flexible, my mind more determined than ever before on what it is I need to do this year.
Today we hugged, gloriously, back-crackingly, and parted, each of us in new directions but burning with the same focussed motivation, flying speedily towards all the dreams we have only fantasised about for years and years.
And as Brett belted out into the mountains as we hiked on Christmas day,
“Now is the essence of my domain! and it contains
all that was and will be!
And I am as I was and will be because I am and always will be!”
~ Saul Williams
Yes! NOW is the essence of my DOMAIN! HYAH! HYAH! HYAH! Sha-Clack-Clack!
I just went on an amazing solitary hike around Terlingua, over a hill, past Clyde’s house that burnt down and back into the Ghost Town where I currently live at Sinta’s. The wind had whipped up my dry seriously unwashed hair into a vision I can only describe as a bunch of desert twigs scrunched with hairbands covered in old nests and leaves. I love how in Terlingua that passes for “looking pretty good”. I felt pretty good too. more…
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Jo… Winter’s a cold lonely bitch up in that mountain. But under her plush white fur coat lies your miracle… your little seed patiently waiting for the first crack of sunlight. I recognise your seed, I sense all that potential, and it is so much more than you realise. Let the anticipation nurture your dreams! Spring is coming soon, but if you feel as I do that we don’t have a moment to lose, to live this life the way we were born to, come out to the desert to sprout, to feel everything, to heal, to play and flourish with me! I will squeeze you tight with all my might and hold your hands, up to the Sun. We who love and laugh all day are Children of the Sun! Her children are always happy, always peaceful, always free. I will make sure you will not leave this place without feeling unbelievably happy and loved.
