Mountain Views

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
~ Wayne Dyer

This is an incredibly powerful truth. In fact, I’ve been finding everything changes when the way I feel about things changes. And when that happens, my energy shifts into a higher gear, and an opportunity for a peaceful life opens up. Permanent peace and happiness. Good things are attracted into my life. More of what I’m thinking of is drawn towards me. There is a lightness to my step, and I am now finally finding, a freedom from fear. Despite what many would feel are unwanted complications to deal with and intense, persistent encounters that would be worrisome to some, this past week has turned into the happiest and most content I can remember for a long time. Without going into specific details I will try to illustrate exactly how powerful a new perspective can be.

Each day that goes by I am relaxing more and more into how things are working themselves out. I am finally changing the way I in recent months tended to perceive things in a mistrusting and fearful way, and falling back into how I always perceived life with complete trust that it would all work out perfectly. I am finding peace and rest from bothering ways of thinking by taking a peek at life every now and then through his eyes. A refreshing new perspective for me — way more laid back. I am relaxing in my lover’s constant arms around me, his hands that reach out for mine without thinking, our true and tested friendship through painful hardships, our passion for each other, the admiration and respect that grows huger every day. I have always known and felt his love and faithfulness to be true to my deepest instincts, and my instincts have never failed me in my life. In my previous relationship I had huge overwhelming doubts and a multitude of fears that loomed all the time and I chose not to listen for years. In that time I became an insecure person, all the time. But that is not who I really am at all. I am no longer that person. I am listening now. All the time. I don’t make a single decision anymore without checking in with the old instincts first and I follow it always.

After a recent and absolutely terrible tragedy in my sweetheart’s life, ex-partners and a painfully unavoidable situation arose that would for many relationships prove to be too distressing to recover from. But we didn’t need to stress over it. After a bit of a false start where we weren’t sure how to respond to the situation, we each in our own way chose to do things differently, support each other and try to understand what the other person needed to get through it with as little distress as possible. Even with everything going on for him, even through the grieving he found a way to do this for me.

And in turn, I realised that his compassion for the loved ones in his past, as he figures out how that all fits into our life together, how to close chapters, what to keep open, doesn’t need to hang over me. His compassion, concern and love for the people in his past takes nothing away from us. It never did or could. It is a completely different love from our love. So why stress over it unnecessarily? I fell in love with him because he is a compassionate man who is trustworthy, loyal and trusting to a fault. A man who has so much compassion and love for others it seems to have no permanent bearing even if they have hurt him terribly. Despite my feelings towards those who have hurt him, his loyalty has no bounds. So I realised, why fight something that I originally found so beautiful in him? Why try to change something so sweet? In this way (amongst many) he is a bigger person than I have ever tried to be before. I am learning. I could love more. I could forgive more. Letting go of bitterness. Judgment. Big life lessons. This is a big opportunity. Letting go of these things would free me even more than I already am. And so I have been thinking about this a lot, realising that opportunities are always falling into my lap — and this is one I have been looking for, needed to work on for some time. I am very attracted to freedom. Especially freedom from yucky feelings from the past. I want this freedom really badly.

I have been closely following my gut instincts all the time, tempering every decision and perspective lately. I know I’m on the right track this time. I choose inner freedom. I choose inner peace. I choose to look for beauty in everything, in every situation, even in people who have hurt me. The instant this happens, everything becomes beautiful and life responds to me in beautiful new and unexpected ways. As I learn to be more forgiving of myself and others, life has become more forgiving towards me. Whatever I focus my attention on, I seem to get more of.

Everything is changing all around me. I like where this is going.

This entry was posted by } bird { on Monday, June 7th, 2010 at 1:14 am and is filed under blogalog, Personal, the pursuit of happiness, wildishheart. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.